True Fact about Goldie DeWitt

A TRUE FACT about GOLDIE DEWITT…..
 
I poop once in the morning and one more time late at night.
 
I absolutely CAN NOT poop at someone else’s house.
I absolutely CAN NOT poop at a restaurant or public place.
I absolutely CAN NOT poop and wipe my ass with toilet paper and carry on with my day.
 
If we sharing the same hotel room, I will not poop in that restroom while you in the room. I will wait for you to get ready and leave the room completely then I will handle my business, shower, get dressed and meet up with you. When I’m traveling my stomach tends to lock up. I might not poop or maybe just once. Then when I get home, it’s something like the 4th of july!!
 
After I poop I MUST SHOWER and WASH my ass with soap.
 
FACT: I have rented a cheap hotel room just to take a poop & shower cause I was too far away from driving all the way home.
 
Question: Do you wipe your face with dry tissue as a method of cleaning it? Fuck no! So how in the fuck are you gonna wipe your shity asshole with dry toilet paper and call yourself having a clean ass and you up and back in traffic. Nope! All you did was dry wipe some shit around your asshole until it smeared itself IN. Into your skin, into the toilet paper. But YOU NOT CLEAN. Yeah think about it. It’s that serious. Now some of you gonna say you use WET WIPES. Well, that’s the best while on the go. But if you have a shower, or a wash cloth & soap near, you better fully wash yo ass before you take yo hot ass anywhere.
 
I hope this helps to bring a new self-awareness to many of you to take more careful attention to keeping yourself clean.
 
THERE’S A LOT OF DIRTY MUTHERFUCKERS OUT THERE, BE PROUD & FEEL GOOD TO KNOW THAT YOU’RE NOT ONE OF THEM…. OR MAYBE YOU ARE!!!
 
Call me what you want to, but when it comes down to it, I just like to feel & know that I’m clean.
 
You best know this goes out to the ladies & gentlemen.
 
STAY READY SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO GET READY!!
 
Goldie DeWitt

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